I don't know about you all, but for me, stumbleupon.com is probably the ultimate in time-wasting, pro-procrastination websites. Ever.
If you've never tried it, I highly suggest typing the address into your URL bar (preferably not before you think you're going to get started on some kind of project) and getting lost in the internet.
Here's the premise; you go to the pilot website, and click on all the "interests" that you'd enjoy reading/seeing/hearing about. After that, click "Stumble" and prepare to be amazed. You'll find some of the most hilarious articles on Cracked.com (my personal favorite), and The Oatmeal is good for a fast laugh (but only if your internet connection is super fast--this one has a tendency to take forever to load). Obviously everyone knows about The Onion, but there are a lot of other spoof-papers that can deliver a quick, work-friendly (or not so work-friendly) laugh.
There are also a lot of how-to webpages that Stumble can get for you; if, for example, you're one of the rare few people out there with an abnormal, non-24 hour sleep cycle, there's a site out there to help you "hack your brain," and make it so you can function more normally (and at a better rate sometimes) than those of us plodding through the 24-hour sleep cycle.
Believe it or not, Etsy is also included on Stumble. This surprised me because Etsy is a relatively well known site among the indie-eco-fashion-blah-blah-pretentious-blah conscious (including myself, by the way), and I figured it would be too "big" for Stumble to carry. Guess not though, which is nice because it took me to this cool store where they had nature/owl themed old-looking stuff.
I love owls. I love nature. I love old looking stuff. You can guess how that turned out.
Anyways, my nerdtastic schpiel will stop here with me urging you to go waste your life on Stumbleupon.com. It makes school so much more bearable.
Something I noticed around Bloomington (also known as wouldn't-exist-without-IU, Indiana), is that it's very, very hard to look cute, and be warm at the same time. Either you look like a bloated, burnt marshmallow, or you freeze your ass off in an adorable, entirely useless little peacoat.
Or you just look like a she-tool with a North Face jacket, a v-neck t-shirt that stops at your hips, and a pair of black leggings stuffed into your (F)Uggs.
I'm assuming/hoping no one gets offended with my last description, but please admit that your ass is cold if you do wear that outfit. Acting like it isn't cold as a witches tit while you're not wearing pants makes you look like a big ol' douche.
And no one wants that.
So, here are some Cold-As-Fuck Weather Tips for looking Cute, courtesy of Miss Guided's School of Cover-Your-Ass.
1. Get a coat that actually covers said frozen buttocks. That's the only way to make sure you don't freeze it off without resorting to padded long-johns. Which we all know is a whole lot of bad idea.
Nordstrom.com actually has a feature where you can sort by length, which is helpful. If you're tall, definitely consider a longer coat, but for the rest of us average sized and/or vertically challenged folk, try for a pant-length coat. It'll come to just about the middle or the top of your thigh.
Look how happy that model is! She's warm, probably, and her twiggy little behind is toasty and safe.
Learn from her.
Random Note; Miss Guided believes firmly and strongly that tights, leggings and the sort are NOT PANTS. Do not wear them as such and two things will happen; your butt will not freeze off and people will want to kill you less.
This coat is great in more than one way; it's the right length, an unusual color, and the horizontal seam in the middle cuts your body in just the right place where anyone can carve out a waist.
The color is great for one because the lovely eggplant hue compliments just about anyone, but its also perfect because you won't get lost in the sea of blacks, browns and the occasional white coats. Believe me, as a current (recovering) black-coat/pants/shirts/shoes addict, it's refreshing to see and have a pretty, poppy color on one piece in every part of your wardrobe.
2. PLEASE LEAVE THE LEGGINGS UNDER THE DRESSES AND SKIRTS. Please. I'm begging you. I decided to make it a full number because I think it needs that much attention. I don't want to see the contours of your butt, or your underwear. No one does. The people who do are the ones you probably want to avoid.
3. Find a coat that works for YOUR body. Just because that strange, sallow, anorexic girl that you're sitting next to in your Intro to Calculus class is wearing one of those no-shaped, ruffly, thirty-tiered monstrosities, does not mean that it can look nearly as almost-not-ugly on anyone else. It'll be uglier. And more terrifying.
If you're like almost 95% of the college population, anything with a tie-waist, darting, an A-line or a combination of the three will make you look gorgeous, warm (if it's thick, possibly lined with down or made of heavy wool with a good liner) and not-marshmallowy. Quilting is a good thing, because that usually means there will be down involved. If you must take the marshmallow approach (believe me, I have a coat that has eau de marshmallow seeped into it's quilted, downy, nylon wonderful-ness), make sure that it's a longer coat (again, pant length), and/or has lines on it that streamline or carve an hour-glass figure for you.
4. Love the coat you buy. Make sure that you're totally, 100% entirely, ecstatically in love with your coat, because then you might actually wear it. If you don't love it, you won't wear it. I promise.
5. Avoid leopard prints. Please.
Beyond all that, I wish you all a happy and safe start to the new semester (those of you who have started) and a bitter middle finger to those of you who don't start for another week, and are probably in Cabo right now soaking up cancer.
Lots of love,
Miss Guided.
If you've never tried it, I highly suggest typing the address into your URL bar (preferably not before you think you're going to get started on some kind of project) and getting lost in the internet.
Here's the premise; you go to the pilot website, and click on all the "interests" that you'd enjoy reading/seeing/hearing about. After that, click "Stumble" and prepare to be amazed. You'll find some of the most hilarious articles on Cracked.com (my personal favorite), and The Oatmeal is good for a fast laugh (but only if your internet connection is super fast--this one has a tendency to take forever to load). Obviously everyone knows about The Onion, but there are a lot of other spoof-papers that can deliver a quick, work-friendly (or not so work-friendly) laugh.
There are also a lot of how-to webpages that Stumble can get for you; if, for example, you're one of the rare few people out there with an abnormal, non-24 hour sleep cycle, there's a site out there to help you "hack your brain," and make it so you can function more normally (and at a better rate sometimes) than those of us plodding through the 24-hour sleep cycle.
Believe it or not, Etsy is also included on Stumble. This surprised me because Etsy is a relatively well known site among the indie-eco-fashion-blah-blah-pretentious-blah conscious (including myself, by the way), and I figured it would be too "big" for Stumble to carry. Guess not though, which is nice because it took me to this cool store where they had nature/owl themed old-looking stuff.
I love owls. I love nature. I love old looking stuff. You can guess how that turned out.
Anyways, my nerdtastic schpiel will stop here with me urging you to go waste your life on Stumbleupon.com. It makes school so much more bearable.
Something I noticed around Bloomington (also known as wouldn't-exist-without-IU, Indiana), is that it's very, very hard to look cute, and be warm at the same time. Either you look like a bloated, burnt marshmallow, or you freeze your ass off in an adorable, entirely useless little peacoat.
Or you just look like a she-tool with a North Face jacket, a v-neck t-shirt that stops at your hips, and a pair of black leggings stuffed into your (F)Uggs.
I'm assuming/hoping no one gets offended with my last description, but please admit that your ass is cold if you do wear that outfit. Acting like it isn't cold as a witches tit while you're not wearing pants makes you look like a big ol' douche.
And no one wants that.
So, here are some Cold-As-Fuck Weather Tips for looking Cute, courtesy of Miss Guided's School of Cover-Your-Ass.
1. Get a coat that actually covers said frozen buttocks. That's the only way to make sure you don't freeze it off without resorting to padded long-johns. Which we all know is a whole lot of bad idea.
Nordstrom.com actually has a feature where you can sort by length, which is helpful. If you're tall, definitely consider a longer coat, but for the rest of us average sized and/or vertically challenged folk, try for a pant-length coat. It'll come to just about the middle or the top of your thigh.
Look how happy that model is! She's warm, probably, and her twiggy little behind is toasty and safe.
Learn from her.
Random Note; Miss Guided believes firmly and strongly that tights, leggings and the sort are NOT PANTS. Do not wear them as such and two things will happen; your butt will not freeze off and people will want to kill you less.
This coat is great in more than one way; it's the right length, an unusual color, and the horizontal seam in the middle cuts your body in just the right place where anyone can carve out a waist.
The color is great for one because the lovely eggplant hue compliments just about anyone, but its also perfect because you won't get lost in the sea of blacks, browns and the occasional white coats. Believe me, as a current (recovering) black-coat/pants/shirts/shoes addict, it's refreshing to see and have a pretty, poppy color on one piece in every part of your wardrobe.
2. PLEASE LEAVE THE LEGGINGS UNDER THE DRESSES AND SKIRTS. Please. I'm begging you. I decided to make it a full number because I think it needs that much attention. I don't want to see the contours of your butt, or your underwear. No one does. The people who do are the ones you probably want to avoid.
3. Find a coat that works for YOUR body. Just because that strange, sallow, anorexic girl that you're sitting next to in your Intro to Calculus class is wearing one of those no-shaped, ruffly, thirty-tiered monstrosities, does not mean that it can look nearly as almost-not-ugly on anyone else. It'll be uglier. And more terrifying.
If you're like almost 95% of the college population, anything with a tie-waist, darting, an A-line or a combination of the three will make you look gorgeous, warm (if it's thick, possibly lined with down or made of heavy wool with a good liner) and not-marshmallowy. Quilting is a good thing, because that usually means there will be down involved. If you must take the marshmallow approach (believe me, I have a coat that has eau de marshmallow seeped into it's quilted, downy, nylon wonderful-ness), make sure that it's a longer coat (again, pant length), and/or has lines on it that streamline or carve an hour-glass figure for you.
4. Love the coat you buy. Make sure that you're totally, 100% entirely, ecstatically in love with your coat, because then you might actually wear it. If you don't love it, you won't wear it. I promise.
5. Avoid leopard prints. Please.
Beyond all that, I wish you all a happy and safe start to the new semester (those of you who have started) and a bitter middle finger to those of you who don't start for another week, and are probably in Cabo right now soaking up cancer.
Lots of love,
Miss Guided.
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